Crazy Season

It has been so nuts around here I haven't had time to think let alone put my thoughts into actual words and some sort of cohesion!

I wanted to wish everybody a Happy Holidays and a very Merry New Year! I'll be getting Merry with my friends and enjoying the holidays here in Chicago and it's very strange for me to be away from my family and I know they feel the same. This year I just couldn't find the enthusiasm to go "home" to Utah for the season. Many things have changed there and Chicago now feels like home, except without the presence of my mom and sister.

In a surprise twist that I'm sure my mother and sister are still shaking their heads about is the fact that I'm actually cooking for the holiday! That's right, the girl that doesn't even like to bother making toast is cooking: ham, roast and funeral potatoes for friends on Christmas day. Of course this is also the girl that does not own a kitchen table or enough chairs and plates for everybody, but we'll make do.

Cheers to all, be careful of all that eggnog, it adds pounds faster than fruitcake. Watch out for flying reindeer, those hooves are sharp as fuck. Don't sit on Santa's lap, because let's face it, after 8 years-old it's downright creepy!

Holiday Mood!

One could argue that without children, Christmas just isn't anything speical these days. I'm one of those "singles" out there, that enjoys the holidays with friends and family and various activities designed strictly for the adult crowd. This last weekend my friends and I participated in a Twelve Bars of Christmas dressed in our holiday finest and proceeded to drink and "crawl" our way through Chicago.

A few years ago, I convinced some Salt Lake friends to participate in a Santa Pub Crawl. I made some costumes and we joined a group of revelers and hit the town. Throughout the years it proceeded with more friends, crazier costumes and culminated last year in me convincing a huge group of friends to create our own crawl. This year I was very happy to discover Chicago does a multitude of crawls, "Ugliest Holiday Sweater" "Santa Con" "TBOX" and the "Twelve Bars of Christmas". I had no problem convincing my girls here to let me make some costumes and join the crawl.

We started at 3pm on Saturday and by the time we had covered ten of the twelve bars on the list, returned to meet up with some guys we'd met earlier at another bar and finally make my way home it was 3am! I find that I am getting better at sustained drinking, limiting myself to one drink per hour and then finally cutting myself off about 10pm. I met some new friends and had a blast with old friends. Our costumes were a total success and we've decided to do another crawl on the 20th. Got to keep that holiday spirit going!

Behold I give you our Santa Pub Crawl:

Five Reasons.....

Five reasons why I won't be able to shop for a new Holiday cocktail dress this weekend:

1) It's cold outside.

2) It's the Kris Kringle Crawl on Saturday, which means all day drinking and crawling (bar crawl, not on my actual knees)! Oh and The Professor's B-day celebration that night. Hopefully she won't mind if I stop by dressed in red velvet and white fur, already sufficiently liquored up enough to be friendly to everybody. Repeat after me - I drink to be friendly.

3) It's REALLY COLD outside!

4) Sunday Funday is already booked and when brunch starts at noon, it's an all day drinking and football affair and there is absolutely no way I can have an opinion on a cocktail dress when I'm seeing double. I might end up buying a dress that makes me look like an extra for Pink Elephants on Parade.

5) It is FUCKING COLD OUTSIDE!

Ok, now that I have gotten that out of my system, I promise I will not whine about the cold anymore this year. However January and February of 2009 are not included in that deal. You have now been warned.

I Really Am Funny!

Today I used the following expression "I was wandering the halls of my mind, but I was distracted by the clicking of my heels." Holy shit I have never had such a big laugh in my life! And it came from a table full of MBAs. - Total score!

Waxing Religious....for a brief moment.

I just happened to read this article about the "War on Christmas" and then I read this one earlier from my hometown newspaper. The one question I have is when did all this happen? When did "we" start to perceive somebody's lack of saying "Merry Christmas" as anti-christian? I do remember all the to-do a few years ago about the official White House "Holiday" card not containing the word "Christmas" but when did it get to be such an issue? I always assumed that as a society we collectively became smarter, I guess I was wrong. It boggles my mind that people are setting battle lines based on this issue.

For one thing, there are many more faiths out there than just Christian, who celebrate a holiday in December; Hanukkah, Kwanza, Winter Solstice anybody? Not to mention the Hajj starts in Dec, there is also Eid-Ul-Adha and Al-Hijira...if you ask me the Muslims have this month down, just based on the number of recognized holidays!

Second, doesn't Santa say "Merry Christmas"? I mean isn't that his line right after Ho, Ho, Ho? And didn't the Christians wage a war on Santa a few years ago? If you really want to get technical, Santa has nothing to do whatsoever with the Christ is Christmas. Just saying!

Third, (and lastly) if you ask me the way most people celebrate Christmas has very little-to-nothing to do with what Christmas is really supposed to mean to Christians anyway. I understand the gift giving as symbolic of the Wise Men, but that's about it right? I'm pretty sure the Wise Men, if they were still around, wouldn't be sleeping outside a Wal-Mart on Thanksgiving, waiting to rush the doors at 5AM and trample to death a 28 year-old employee or stab an 18 year-old teenager to get the last $299 laptop!

If that's your idea of Christmas, then go ahead and say Merry Christmas all you want, I'll stay clear thanks.

My whole point is, if you say Merry Christmas to me and I say, "Thanks, Happy Holidays to you!" Please don't be offended, let me have my holidays, all of them how I choose to have them. You are more than welcome to your idea of Christmas, whatever that may be, and I'll never judge you for it.

A Funny Feeling

This morning I left the house without my phone and it wasn't until I was almost at my office that I realized it. The funny feeling was this - I feel like I've left my house wearing a flouncy dress and I have forgotten to put on underwear!

I realize most of us have attachments to our phones; they are the lifelines to our friends and family when we're out and about living our daily lives. But we've become so attached that when we forget them somewhere, they lose battery life, we leave them in a taxi or drop them in a gin and tonic, we feel naked. Hell you might as well cut off our left arm for all the good we're going to be that day without our phone. It's the idea that while I'm without my phone, an important call may just come in and I won't be around to get it!

On the other hand it's also slightly liberating and mildly exciting...like having a good stiff wind blow right up your dress, sans the underwear.