Monday, October 6, 2008


You know that feeling you have when you've finally figured something out and you're all, "Oh yeah, you can't fool me, I'm on to you!" and then it all changes. Like a gust of wind just came out of nowhere and blew the shit out of your house of cards?

Oh yeah, you know what I'm saying.

After 34 years on this earth, and nearly half of that dating boys/men...OK boys, I thought I had it figured out. Boys are simple creatures and women are complex, it comes from being put on a pedestal all of our lives. Boys are raised to be simple creatures, this in no way whatsoever means they're dumb, it just means they don't get caught up in drama and nonsense, the way we women can sometimes...OK a lot of times. So you'd think meeting a guy would be a simple task right? You meet, you exchange numbers, you chat, you go out and you either decide to go out again or you don't. Pretty simple.

At this point you might be wondering where I'm heading, I'll get to the point. Over the summer I have met quite a few guys and they all ask for your number, and if they're not texting you right away that night, then you never hear from them at all. Seriously, what gives with that shit? Then my friend TBills was telling me how this Chicago things goes, you meet all sorts of people during the summer and then the guys get around to calling you in the winter. Apparently it's the "cooking-for-one "dating routine. When you're cooking for one it can get pretty expensive, so you cook a lot of food and then freeze the leftovers for later. Guys gather numbers during the summer when it's hot and the girls are out and abundant, but there are just too many to settle down with one for the summer, so they stockpile numbers. When it starts turning cold, they give you a call and see if you want to "hang-out".

I received two such calls yesterday! While I was at the Sox game with my friend Jennine and two of her guy friends, I received a text from one of the guys I met very early in the summer and haven't seen nor heard from since and last night just as I was about to go to bed I received an actual call from another. Now, I have a pretty good memory, I remember faces, names, dates, places and numbers. But for the life of me I could not remember either of these guys! I had to text the first guy and ask who he was, which he responded and I promptly decided that I didn't need to reply. The phone call was awkward because I had to fake my way through it until I could finally figure it all out and I'm not very good at faking it. So, if I have a pretty good memory and I can't remember you, how in the hell do you remember me?

Personally I think all the boys in Chicago are stockpiling a bunch of numbers in a big giant freezer somewhere in the city and when it gets cold they just go to the freezer, pull out a number and give it a try! Now it all makes sense to me, like that same gust of wind reversed course and just blew my house of cards back to upright!


Nilsa S. said...

Two calls in one day? Doesn't that make you wonder whether they saw you on TV or something? Nevertheless, it's true about boys in Chicago. They are so much less likely to be serious about dating in the summer than they are in the winter. What gives?!

kel said...

Things always come in 3's. Let me know when you get your 3rd call.

Summer said...

Great post! Guess when it rains it pours and now that the weather is starting to turn colder the boys are thinking "who will keep me warm tonight? Ah, maybe I have a shot in hell with Sexy Doni." Boys are so dumb.