PRIDE

Ok A) it took me 3 tries to actually log on to my account B) it's PRIDE day in Chicago and C) I am so utterly inebriated it took me forever to function, and I'm just home long enough to pop some Advil and head out again.

A little recap so far: I met my friend Scotty at Ave Tav for brunch, then we chilled while we waited for the others to show up and the parade to start. The parade started at 12:30 and ended at 5:30 and this included two deluges of rain, which surprisingly only added to the hilarity and revelry of the parade. Seriously 4 hours of pride parade and vodka cranberry and I am in a world of messed up. However, I just received a text from MG II and she needs help at Duffy's and so I find myself at home in time to dry off, change clothing and head out again.

Regarding a prior post of MG II, though I may be a slight bit judgemental regarding her trip to the Caribbean, this afternoon made me rethink my opinion of her. Funny how life can throw you a curve ball when you're watching the pride parade.

Note: This guy had the greatest legs!

Today's Lunch Companion

I'm just happy it wasn't a rat!

The Young Metrosexual

There are guys who are hot and guys who are cool and then there is the rare breed that combines hot and cool, with a sense of fashion and flair and we get the Metrosexual. These guys are always up on the latest in GQ, Maxim, Stuff and sometimes Vogue, they attract the straight ladies and the gay men and never worry about their masculinity. They sure are pretty to look at.

Every morning Monday thru Thursday, these metro boys enter the bus, with a calm swagger like a cat brushing by your leg, they are usually wearing fashionable suits, carrying a leather briefcase or messenger bag, their shoes are shined, their hair is gelled, the cologne is just right, they are accessorized with the impressive watch and stylish sunglasses and their tie is never contrasting with their shirt. They are the young Mr. Big in training. On Friday these metro boys are usually togged in the latest syle of wide leg denim, with the currently stylish square toed loafers, usually a print button down shirt, cuffs rolled 3 times, always tucked with a belt matching the shoes.

These are the young lawyers, new financial geniuses, newly minted MBAs and I would imagine sometimes they're the new guy, running copy, but knowing the code of: dress to impress. They are smart and they know it. Their bravado, wit and charm will make them wealthy. They are the future ladies and gentlemen...and they spend more on clothing, shoes, hair care, personal hygeine and jewelry than most of us.

Coming Soon

I'm going to try and start a new Friday feature...bus personalities.

A little background, I live in a part of town with mostly twenty-somethings and thirty-somethings, mostly middle to lower middle-class and mostly single people. From what I can gather, in my neighborhood there are; new lawyers, administrative assistants, financial folk (me), advertising people and retail girls. We all ride the bus downtown every day, Monday thru Friday, and for the last six months, I have watched and studied all of my bus compadres with fascination. In this weekly section I will try and break down the varied personalities I see on the bus.

Tomorrow's post will feature the twenty-something, metrosexual, lawyer/finance guy.

Dating and Relating

Let me start by saying I am a notoriously bad dater. I suck at small talk, then I feel like I’m talking too much and then there’s a lull in the conversation and I start blabbering on and on because I’m nervous. I also have a hard time meeting people, because let’s face it, I’m not exactly the friendliest person out there, and it’s not because I’m mean, I am just incredibly shy! Seriously, I should have a shirt made that says, “I drink to be friendly” so people would know to buy me a drink first.

So imagine my surprise when today’s lunch date went very well. Last week I was sitting in riverside plaza by the river having lunch and doing the crossword, then I dropped my pen, a guy picked it up for me and the next thing you know I’m running late for work because I’ve had such a great time talking to this guy. We exchanged info and he e-mailed me suggesting lunch.

Which brings us to today's date - So far so good, the lunch was great, the conversation flowed, he talked about his boat, I talked about Utah and no alcohol necessary…yet.

Weekend Recap

Ok, this is going to be quick because I've run out of time and energy.

Friday was nice, I went to my first burlesque class, then went home and had some alone time with the kitty. He's been moody lately, so I decided to give him a little extra "me" time. We snuggled on the couch and watched the entire first season of Californication. love, love, love David Duchovny.

Saturday I got up, went to the gym, came home, did a little light cleaning, had brunch and watched game #2 of the Crosstown Classic at the Ave Tav. Then I met up with some friends and we went to see the Drive By Truckers at the Taste of Randolph and capped it all off with a little club hopping, ending up at Tryst.

# of texts rec'd from friends in SLC - 7 (nice surprise about a possible relocation & jealousy over concert)

# of texts sent to friends in SLC - numerous (3 or 4 to friend about possible relocation, 3 or 4 to friend who hates me but hearts me all at the same time *love you girl* and 1 big one to BFF asking her to move her lovely self to Chicago to save me from stupid girls!)

#of bourbon & diet cokes imbibed - a few, not so much as to get drunk, but I only drink to be friendly. Therefore I drank just enough.

# of shots - a lot, but in my defense I didn't order any of them, I just drank whatever was put in front of me.

# of blocks walked home - ohmyfuckinggodtoomany

Sunday, surprisingly went to the gym, then went to a bbq with the volleyball team and others (the firemen) and watched game #3 of the Crosstown Classic (Cubs won all 3!). Got home in time to snap picture of kitty cat passed out on living room rug (posted below) and then had my own personal Johnny Depp/Orlando Bloom Pirates of the Caribbean marathon.

The End.

Axis Slightly Off-Kilter

Today I had one of those moments. You know the kind that makes you re-think your age, identity, friendships, etc. Today, a very good friend of mine changed his profile picture on Facebook and let’s just say the picture was definitely dated. It looks like a prom/high school dance photo, and it’s sometime in the late seventies. I have never thought of this friend as old, even though I know he’s older than me, he’s always been a peer and seeing as how he hangs with all of us in our varying ages, I just never really thought of the age gap until I saw the photo. Though he does look smokin' in the photo (Sorry I cannot post the picture here due to privacy…which is a total bummer!) And then I started to wonder, did I ever think I would ever grow-up, like I always imagined adults do? You know; have the whole husband, kids, house in the 'burbs thing.

I’m now in my mid-thirties and when I look at my life, which I am very fortunate to have; I am single, well established career wise, financially secure (both now and for the future), I am well traveled and continue to travel as much as possible, I have friends from varied backgrounds all over the world and I have an education that nobody can take away from me. But if I compare my life as it is now, with what I thought life was supposed to be like at this point; I am fully 180 degrees in the other direction. I guess when you’re growing up you look at your parents and you either model your life after them or run screaming for the hills, my life is far different from where my mother was at my age and I know she is as much grateful for that as I am. I guess I just always thought of thirty-anything as old and now here I am re-evaluating fifty and sixty!

These are the things I ponder and I wonder about all those kids from my early years who knew exactly what they wanted to be and how they wanted to grow-up. I wonder how many opportunities they have had to re-evaluate their lives and I wonder if they wonder at all?

Sunday Funday

This is what the kitty did this weekend. My weekend was a little more adventurous, details to follow.

I love Fridays!

This is exactly how I feel today.

Sugar Daddy . Com and MG II

So I just returned home from getting a mani pedi, and let me tell you my toes definitely needed it after last night's volleyball game, but that is not the point of this post.

I had mani pedis with the Material Girl, MG is somebody I've known for a short time, and while I've only known her for a short time I've realized that this is the kind of person who won't ever me a really good friend, but she's good for meeting other people.  The reason I refer to her as MG is because her sole purpose in Chicago is to find guys to pay for things, clothes, dinner, drinks, trips, rent, etc. and putting herself into deep debt to accomplish all of this.  This is why she will never be a close friend.  

So a few weeks ago she meets a girl who lives in her building, this girl is young, cute, bubbly and very much like MG.  These two are not afraid of anything or anybody and this is what brings me to the subject at hand...www.sugardaddy.com.  Yep the new girl, we'll call her MG II, as far as I can tell, she decided she needs a sugar daddy and signed up on the afore mentioned website.  Apparently she's met a couple of guys and the latest one is flying her to NYC and then they're heading for St Maarten.  MG II is 22 years-old.  Somebody please PLEASE explain to me what would possess somebody do this...besides the obvious of having some rich guy buy you things and take you places.  Is there any other reason, perhaps a logical, sane reason?  

I'm open to any reasons the internet has to provide.  Something that will give me pause before  I totally go judgmental on her ass. 

Hugs and Other Touchy Things

I believe the human soul requires the body to be touched in loving gestures frequently. With my friends back in SLC I am extremely physically affectionate; I hug and kiss my friends on a regular basis. Not that silly standing-three-feet-away-lean-in-and-a-pat-on-the-back kind of hug or the one arm hug – I hate that one. I’m talking about a full five second hug. Just for note, five seconds is a good long time to invade somebody else’s space, go ahead and try it. Anyway, when I was home last week, I hugged every friend I saw and they were long hugs, because I felt like my soul had been deprived, hell I was even hugging my favorite bartenders. A few friends even commented on the voracity of the hug and I think I may have bruised a few. Sorry…ok, not really, oops unless I did actually cause some damage, then I am sorry.

Most of my friends are physically affectionate as well, for instance Lindsay jumped into my arms, wrapped her legs around me and held on for dear life when she saw me – very touching by the way, it makes me smile even now. Sometimes it struck me at odd moments, like my last night there, I was lounging in Johnny’s office while he was working and as I was leaving the room, I turned back around and walked over and kissed him on top of the head. Believe me I am very lucky that I have friends who will let me do these things to them. There are two people that I wished I had given a proper good-bye hug to, because car hugs are so awkward, but hopefully I will see them both soon so I’ll make up for it then.

My point is, here in Chicago, I don’t have people here that I can hug forcefully, passionately, longingly or emotionally. Last night after volleyball we went to our sponsor bar for dinner and drinks (mostly drinks) and as I was leaving I did give everybody hugs and they of course willingly returned them, but it just didn’t feel the same. I do know it takes time and I’m willing to wait. But let this serve as a warning that the next person who comes to see me is going to have to endure a very, very, very long hug!

Step Monster Stories

Serious question, does anybody out there have any step-mother stories of note that they would like published in a book? Think Cinderella here folks. I know somebody who is putting together/editing a collection of stories about the worst step-mothers in the world, not unlike the Nanny Diaries and others like it. If you have or know of a friend who would like to submit any stories for consideration, please contact me at dnmtrx (at) yahoo (dot) com.

City Dwellers vs Suburbanites

I have never been a suburbanite and for the foreseeable future I don’t plan on ever being a suburbanite. Don’t get me wrong I have no ill will toward the people who live in the ‘burbs, but there is a distinct difference between those who live in the city versus those who chose to live away from the hustle and bustle that a city offers it’s inhabitants. I totally understand the idea of living close to a major city but choosing not to be a full-time resident. Things like raising a family, affordability and moving away from congestion and higher crime. I however, choose the hordes of people and variety of city living. I could totally do with less crime though, couldn’t everybody?

What brings me to this point is that after living here for only a short while you can spot the subs in an instant. Sometimes it is subtle, others are more glaring characteristics, but either way there is a physical distinction between the two. Let’s break it down. Note: There are exceptions to every rule.

Clothing: While I wouldn’t say subs are ALL less fashionable, because let’s face it some people in the ‘burbs are loaded and do their shopping in upscale shops (mostly in the city) and have clothing tailored for a better fit. But the majority of the subs choose chain stores for shopping, which ultimately produce a frumpy look due to mass production and average sizing. Whereas in the city, you can find an alteration shop on most blocks and people in the city will have their clothes tailored for a better fit. Even though we buy off the rack and at chain stores, the clothing and total look is fitted and polished – for the most part. There are always exceptions…I have been known to be the exception sometimes.

Hair: This is very much the same as the clothing situation. It’s like West Valley vs Capitol Hill. If you’re from Utah you totally know what I’m talking about. Once again I can be the exception to this as well because I’m now dealing with humidity and naturally curly hair…ugh!

Stature: Subs just seem to be a little softer in the middle, if you catch my drift. Don’t mistake me, I am no size 4 super model (or are they now size 2?), but when you do more walking than driving your body gets toned and tighter. Your legs don’t jiggle anymore or at lest not as much. Of course people come in all shapes and sizes, I totally get that, it’s just different.

Accessories: Sometimes this difference is all you need! The difference between carrying your lunch/extra shoes/take home work in a plastic Target bag versus a Dooney & Burke leather tote pretty much makes my point. Not being a snob here, just pointing out what I see. For the record I do not own a D&B leather anything.

The reason I point out all these differences is because I get off the bus/train in the middle of downtown Chicago and walk 4 blocks west to my office. My office is directly east of two of the major commuter rail stations in Chicago. So while I’m heading west, the commuters from the ‘burbs are heading east. This happens all over downtown because the city rails (the “L”) and buses all come into the middle of downtown and the commuter rails come in on the outskirts of downtown. So every morning I am passing subs and noting the difference.

Since this blog is about my experiences in Chicago versus my experiences in SLC I just thought I would point this out. Do I ultimately have a point here? I don’t really know, but last week while I was in SLC, wearing something I had purchased here in Chicago and had altered to fit, I did get a lot of compliments...A LOT! So, either consciously or subconsciously I noted the difference and adopted the city dwelling lifestyle. Albeit without the D&B leather tote...someday!

Tweaked Knee, Four Painkillers and a Whole Lot of Deadliest Catch

Since I spent a lot of Saturday walking through the River North Arts Festival and then walking approximately 2 miles home after drinking copious amounts of wine at afore mentioned arts festival I woke up on Sunday morning with a swollen and aching left knee. I had my knee cut open and put back together about 9 years ago, but sustained activity can still be cause for pain the day after…not unlike sustained drinking one day, leads to a hangover the next day.

Seeing has how my knee was going to hurt all day, I decided to have a lay-in on Sunday and I parked my knee (and my ass) on the couch, turned on Discovery Channel and much to my surprise was the entire re-broadcasting of the King Crab season of Deadliest Catch. I will admit to being attracted to the blue collar guys in this world, though I mostly date white collar, because we usually run in the same circles. Short of me visiting construction sites and drilling rigs on a regular basis I guess it will remain that way for now. So having an entire afternoon with my favorite guys in Alaska I was considering myself a happy girl. I made a pot of French press coffee, popped a painkiller and arranged the laptop, the pillow for my knee, the fleece for Sage to sleep on and the remote all for easy access from my comfortable viewing location. Needless to say after eight hours, two more painkillers and way too much coffee I was ready to get out of the house.

I ventured to the grocery store long enough to stock up on wine, which was getting precariously low at my house, but considering I can buy wine/liquor at the 7-11 on the corner it’s not that big of a nightmare should I run out. I avoided the sweets/candy aisle; picked up some more essentials and made it home in time to catch Ocean’s Thirteen on HBO and down one more painkiller.

All in all it wasn’t an exciting weekend, because sometimes you have to pay the price one day for fun the day before…which is what hangovers are all about.

Saturday in, where else, Chicago

This afternoon I took a detour on my way to the River North Arts Festival and walked down Halsted to do some spring shopping. This took me past the Diversey/Halsted fire house. Seeing as how all the men on my co-ed volleyball team are all firefighters from this house, I figured it was inevitable that I would see at least one person I know. As I was walking toward the house the lights and sirens went off so I stopped at the edge of the driveway to let the engines leave. Engine 44 passed and a chorus of "Hey Doni" rang out.

I LOVE THIS CITY!

Bus Etiquette

For those of you who haven’t ever, nor will ever take mass transportation, there are certain rules involved in riding the bus and/or train.

First – Don’t eat, drink, smoke or gamble on the bus/train.
Second – Don’t talk loudly on your cell phone.
Third – Don’t take up more than your seat when sitting. (Obvious exclusion for the larger than life folk out there)
Fourth – Do not exit the bus from the front unless you are disabled.
Fifth – Give up your seat for the elderly, disabled and expectant mothers.

Ok, so those are basically the CTA’s rules…but of course I have a few of my own!

First – Do not breast feed on the bus, seriously you can’t wait until you get where you’re going? I mean, OMG WTF!?! I don’t whip mine out in public and I personally, do not want to see anybody else’s on the bus. Unless you look like Angelina Jolie, then I’m sure most of us wouldn’t mind, unless of course you were breast feeding then you detract from the whole fantasy, thereby negating the fact that you look like Angelina Jolie.
Second – Please, please for the love of Pete, do not smell bad! Take a fucking shower already! This is seriously an issue and it goes hand in hand with BRUSH YOUR TEETH! The number of times I have had to endure somebody else’s body odor and/or bad breath is astounding!
Third – Hang up the fucking phone! Especially when you have a voice closely resembling nails on a chalkboard. None of us within ear shot cares about your weekend plans, we don’t care that your boyfriend is a total dog because he chose to go drinking with the boys after his softball game last night instead of coming home to your sweet soothing voice, we don’t care that the new girl at work dresses like a turtle either.(I might have to make an exception for that one because I have no idea what a turtle dresses like, except for maybe turtlenecks, and then don’t most of us wear turtlenecks sometimes?)
Fourth – When you’re in a large group of people traveling together (mostly young people) please refrain from acting like you own the bus and your conversation is the most important. Basically, SHUT THE HELL UP! Yelling to your friend who is sitting in front of me does not endear you to me at all!
Fifth – If I’m listening to my iPod, don’t write your phone number on the back of your business card, hand it to me, then try to make conversation thinking it’s cute. I understand you think this a prime opportunity to say hi, but when I put the ear buds back in it means I am through talking to you. If that wasn’t enough of a hint, opening my book again should have been. Take a hint is all I’m asking; if you had been attractive or you had said something intelligent and/or witty I wouldn’t be ignoring you.

SLC Quickie

This is a leftover quickie regarding SLC that I would be remiss if I did not mention it.

So a couple of months ago Peabody interviewed Sarah Neilson http://www.sarahnielson/ and Heather & Jon Armstrong http://www.dooce.com/ & http://blubromat.com/. All three of them are outstanding writers/bloggers, all of them are in Utah and all of them are recovering Mormons (my favorite people). I had already been a long time reader of Dooce and Blurbomat but through this interview I was introduced to Sarah. After posting on her blog about loaning out some of my boys for her to consider for a quickie marriage concerning death arrangements (which I totally would still do), Sarah responded. We chatted a bit via e-mail and I promised her Chocolate Covered Espresso Beans.

Anyway, we met for a quick coffee yesterday, and never actually drank any coffee before I had to leave for the airport. She confessed she almost cancelled after seeing a nemesis as a Facebook friend, someone who had previously dated one of my BFFs, and who has since removed me as a Facebook friend, presumably due to this blog. Such is life.

So to my friends, who read this blog, please check her out. Besides being totally hot, she’s an awesome read.

Proper Attire Required - Shirts and Pants Optional

So I’m back home in the Windy City. It’s not surprising how quickly Chicago became home to me. I knew that I needed to create an emotional distance from SLC to match the physical distance; otherwise I was probably going to downward spiral into depression…IMHO, not a good idea. So it is nice to see everybody and have a chance to catch up.

This last trip home was great, I was able to spend time with a lot of friends and even meet some new ones. I also received assurances that certain friends would make the trip to Chicago in the coming months. I’d love to be able to hold them to it, but I’ve never been the enforcer, so I’ll just have to take them at their word.

Now that I’m back here, I will get back to writing about Chicago and all the crazy things I see and hear. For instance, this morning on the #134 express bus, on my way to work downtown with all the other business suit types - a woman got on wearing only a bikini. No joke, no lie!

Same Shoes - Different Me

So it’s been a few days since the last post because I’ve been in SLC visiting friends and family and without my laptop (ugh), but I had to take just a few minutes and write something down.

Upon returning to SLC I met up with friends, had a few drinks (a few too many sometimes), attended a raging 80’s/Headbanger/Hair band party, had dinner at a friend’s house, spent some time with the family and once again met up with friends for dinner at my favorite Indian restaurant. Being home is very easy in one aspect, because you know this city, you know your friends and it never seems to change, but ultimately it’s a little heartbreaking because you realize that people do move on and your place within the group has changed. You go from being a daily part of the puzzle to being the visitor. On one hand it’s nice because for a few days everybody does exactly what you want to do (which rarely happens when they see you every day). But on the other hand, your place within the group that was forged over many dinners, trips, parties, funerals and various other activities has now gone away. Sure your friends still love you, but you no longer matter in their daily routine. They are the same people and so are you, but you now know that your daily lives don’t interact like they used to.

Coming home is like putting on the great pair of shoes that you wore everywhere last year and when you pull them out of your closet after a hiatus they don’t fit the same anymore. It’s not like they’re too big or too small they’re just not the same anymore. They’re still classic, stylish, gorgeous shoes, they just don’t feel the same. I have different shoes I wear now and they’re not better they’re just different.

Today, I miss the way the old shoes felt when I wore them everywhere. I’m torn between the old shoes and the new shoes that I love. When I go home to Chicago they will go back to the closet and I'll be wearing the new shoes once again.

A Smaller Me

So being as tall as I am it’s always been pretty easy for me to hide a few pounds gained here and there. Granted, yes I am larger than the average woman, but given how tall I am I’ve always been HWP. So as I’ve gained pounds over the years I don’t really notice too much, but lately I’ve been apparently losing small amounts of weight over time, truly small like probably a pound here, a few ounces there, nothing major. But this last weekend was when I noticed the change, I went shopping for clothes – MAJOR SHOPPING – and as I perused the stores picking out things I wanted to try on I picked up my standard sizes. At the first store I got into the dressing room and everything was bigger and wasn’t fitting properly! Full disclosure - I’m one of those people who if you’re in the dressing room and you need another size, it’s usually the size up and I get too embarrassed to ask, so I just decide I didn’t really like the shirt/skirt/dress/pants anyway rather than ask for the next size.

However, this time I found myself needing the smaller size! You bet your ass I was going to ask for the smaller size. And guess what, they fit. Not kidding you and guess what – it totally made my weekend.

So today I am wearing the hottest outfit I bought, silver pencil skirt, 4” black Nine West heels, short sleeve black button down blouse and black belt. Except for the shoes, everything is a size smaller!

This all totally makes up for the fact that today my hair lost the humidity battle.

Note to Self

Do not under any circumstances let a fireman buy you a drink! When I said Beam & Coke, it came back with a lot of Beam and a whiff of coke. This is a good way of making sure you’re late and hungover on Wednesday morning.

This is the time I long for the 1 oz shot. The freepour scares me.

Weekend Recap

Let’s start off by saying, except for the sudden downpour on Friday night, the weather this weekend was absolutely phenomenal, seriously I couldn’t have asked for better. So that being said, Friday night was a lovely evening; I actually went to the gym and then met up with friends at Matisse. The Material Girl’s mom was/is in town, and I have to say, “Like mother like daughter”. Originally the plan was to meet at KM for John Primer and the blues, that didn’t happen because they got shit-faced; apparently they had been drinking since noon, so they cancelled at the last minute. Oh well, definitely a pattern of behavior developing here. This is why I ended up at Matisse flirting with Pete (no harm no foul).

Saturday was lovely, I started out early in the morning, hit the gym, then decided to walk the neighborhood, I headed up Broadway to Wrigley Field, then went south on Halsted through boystown. Let me tell you, there is nothing like walking into a “toy” store in boystown! Beats any cheesy Vegas store and the Blue Boutique hands down! I walked down to Diversey, then turned back around and walked up Clark to Wrigley Field again and then finally back down Sheffield and hit the Sheffield/Belmont music festival. I got a call from MG and met her and her mom at the Ave Tav and once again they were shit-faced. We made it to Matisse (once again flirting with Pete) and then I called it a night.

Sunday was wonderful! I went to the Cubs game by myself, sat in the bleachers and let twenty-somethings buy me cheap beer. I love the young ones! I then decided to do some shopping, so I headed down to Michigan and did some damage, then caught a movie. I tried to see SATC, alas; it was all sold-out, so I finally saw Indy 4. I made it home in time to get a call from Phillip and then collapse into bed.

Overall a great weekend; besides I need to rest up for my return home. Considering I already have a full schedule while I’m in SLC and it’s still a week away, I have a feeling I’m going to be exhausted when I get home.